How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
