remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Panties = found
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