It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Randomize
