u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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