You made me cry and you don't even care
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
