Just mADE A PArabola og urine
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Randomize
