Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
