the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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