You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?