Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me