When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
