Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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