Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
