9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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