it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
4 words: hood of his car
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I just found puke in my bra..
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
