the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize