i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
