spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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