Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
