I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
