sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize