That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
