scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
