Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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