Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
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He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
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