I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
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She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
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Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
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