I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
