Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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