listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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