Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
