$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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