She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
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