summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize