I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
