Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
