loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
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When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
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So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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