Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
