Porn is love you can see.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
