Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Everything about him screamed your future.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Randomize
