what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
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