I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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