so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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