Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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