so let's talk penis.
two words: eviction party
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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