What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
