I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
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The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
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