I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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