Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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