I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
