"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
