but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
