She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
